Navigating the Accidental Car Nap: a guide for moms and dads of all ages 

As every parent knows, parenting young children can be unpredictable at times and result in events that are out of your control. Sometimes that unpredictability manifests in the form of an accidental car nap. Whether you’re on your way home from a playdate or running errands or dropping the final nap, these unexpected snoozes can throw a wrench in your carefully planned schedule. However, with a little creativity and understanding, you can turn them into an opportunity for flexibility and build confidence that it won’t always derail your entire day. 

What you’ll learn from this blog:

• Understanding why the accidental car nap happens
• Ideas to keep baby awake in the car
• How to navigate if a car nap happens
• Next steps for the remainder of the day

Understanding the Accidental Car Nap

Children of all ages can often fall asleep in the car because of the gentle motion, coziness of their car seat and white noise creating a soothing environment. This isn’t the case for all babies because unfortunately there are some babies who despise their car seats (so sorry if this is your family!) 

For some babies that are chronically overtired (e.g., frequent, persistent and lengthy night wakings), car naps can happen frequently because they are trying to catch up on any sleep possible. If this is you, you may evaluate your baby’s total sleep schedule and find a method you’re comfortable with trying to get them more sleep in a 24-hour period. This blog will help you understand the recommended amount of sleep in a 24-hour period for babies and children of all ages. 

Ideas to keep baby awake in the car to prevent a car nap

Trying to keep your child awake in the car can take effort and creativity! Here are some options to consider:

• Novel soft toys they can engage with in their car seat
• An empty plastic water bottle (the crinkly sounds of the bottle are exciting and the cause-and-effect relationship when they squeeze it, a noise happens, can make them stay awake)
• Playing fun music
• Talking to them
• A safe snack (e.g., cheerios or a pouch)
• Windows down at the front of the vehicle to create a temperature change and/or wind in the car
• Have an older sibling be silly next to them
• Don’t drive too close to a predictable nap time if you really want to avoid a car nap

Sometimes your child’s sleep drive is too high and despite all best efforts, they may still doze in the car. This is the moment of radical accept as a parent and remembering you can’t control all aspects of your child’s sleep (and learning to let those things go can be really hard and also really freeing when it happens!)

How to navigate if a car nap happens

Despite all best efforts, sometimes a car nap happens. Don’t sweat it. Let’s talk about the options you have.

Assess the situation and ask yourself these guiding questions

• How old is your child and how does extra daytime sleep affect them?
  • If it’s a toddler that is dropping their nap and it’s 5pm and they are sleeping on the way home from daycare, you may consider trying to wake them and not have the nap happen
  • Are they a young baby with short wake windows and you just left a play date? They may need that little snooze and be able to adjust the remainder of the day accordingly by offering awake time and potentially letting them sleep longer or capping other naps in the day to help them through the wonky day.
• If they’ve fallen asleep, how long is your drive? Can you extend it to let them sleep longer and count it as a nap? Is it possible to wake them up? 
• How does your child build and release sleep pressure? Read more about sleep pressure here and why it’s pivotal to understand for your child’s sleep journey. Building (and releasing) sleep pressure is a unique experience and learning your child’s limits is an important part of a successful car napping experience. 

Do some nap math.

• If they’ve fallen asleep for 1-10 minutes in the car, you may be good to proceed with their next nap at their regular scheduled time. For some, they may need to have a bit of extra play time before nap even if they napped for 10 minutes. You’ll need to make a decision based on your baby’s needs.
• If they’ve napped 11-30 minutes, you may consider delaying the nap by the amount of time they slept for. So if they slept for 20 minutes in the car, they may need an extra 20 minutes of play time when they get home before another nap opportunity. For some babies, they may need to double that time. For example, if they napped 15 minutes in the car, they need 30 minutes of extra awake time before attempting the nap once home. Don’t be alarmed if this doesn’t work for your baby, it really depends on their temperament and their preferences – variables that are out of your control! This never worked for my daughter!
• If they napped 30+ minutes, consider this their nap and move on with their awake time. You may need to adjust their schedule/wake time ever so slightly so help them through the shorter amount of nap sleep they got in the car nap. 
• If they fall asleep 5 minutes from home, you may choose to continue driving and allow them to get a full car nap rather than playing nap roulette at home! 

Make a plan

• Do you need to revise plans you have for the day to give them a chance for a crib nap at home?
• Can they handle a mini nap and still get a solid crib nap at home?
• Is it realistic to keep driving to give them a chance to catch a solid car nap?
• Is it safe to wake them up?
• What happens if they don’t nap at home as you hoped?
• If they nap, how will you adjust bedtime to help balance the day?

Next steps for the remainder of the day

If your child is older and working through dropping their nap, if they’ve fallen asleep in the car, you may need to move bedtime later to accommodate this accidental nap.

If your child is a baby and has had a crummy short nap day because of multiple accidental car naps or shorter crib naps as a result of car nap events, you may consider moving bedtime earlier to accommodate the wonky nap day. 

If they had a mini car nap, and you’ve kept them awake for a bit of time at home and they still refuse their crib nap, do a reset. A reset is reading books together, walking around the house together, singing some songs, etc. and then try again in 15-20 minutes. This reset will help to rebuild some sleep pressure to help the next nap attempt. 

Accidental car naps take some trial and error to figure out the best action plan for your child. Don’t panic if the day doesn’t go smoothly. You are trying your best and are attempting to give them opportunities for sleep – sometimes it works well, sometimes it doesn’t. 

Embrace the Flexibility

Parenthood requires flexibility, and sometimes an accidental car nap can be a reminder to relax and adjust. I also know how hard that is to accept at the moment! It does get easier with time. It also gets a lot easier when you aren’t approaching these tricky situations from a place of precarious sleep to begin with. When you’re approaching tricky situations from a rested and relaxed perspective, they can be easier to navigate because you can have confidence that sleep will get back on track after a hard day. 

Accidental car naps are just one of the many surprises that come with parenting young children. By staying calm and adaptable, you can handle these sleepy detours with confidence.

Wishing you a smooth drive and easy nap!

Chelsea

Chelsea is Mom of 2 and a Baby, Toddler and Child Sleep Consultant. She has advanced certification in Infant and Early Mental Health and Pediatric Sleep Health and has a Master’s of Professional Education with a specialization in Applied Behaviour Analysis. She has a comprehensive intake assessment that helps determine the most appropriate route for families to reach their sleep goals (and sometimes this means a referral to a different provider!). Chelsea supports families within Hamilton and beyond with hands-on, no cry-it-out, responsive methods towards longer naps and better nights. Chelsea works collaboratively with families to empower them with the confidence and tools they need to reach their unique sleep goals. Hear from rested families here and book a free call with Chelsea here to discuss how she can support your family’s journey to more sleep.