“Why is my baby waking up so much in the night?” is a commonly asked question by tired parents of all ages.
When a newborn arrives, it is expected and understood that they will wake frequently throughout the night for snuggles, feeds and diaper changes. We are primed for this and to some extent, can somewhat cope with this predictable, tired phase… some days and nights are easier than others, that’s for sure.
Before we dive deeper into night wakings, I’d like to say that if your 4+ month baby is waking frequently in the night and your family is coping well with this, then it’s all good. On the contrary, if your baby is waking frequently and you’re not coping well with this anymore, it’s ok to seek support to guide these changes too. Sleep deprivation isn’t a badge of honour and there is no trophy for “the most tired parent”. Find what works for your family and be confident in that decision. If you’re curious about my story as a mama of two and a sleep consultant, check it out here. When I say I understand what it’s like to feel so tired, I truly do!
What you’ll learn from this blog:
- Get curious about your child’s sleep
- 5 reasons for night wakings
- How to support your child and improve night sleep
- How a sleep consultant can help if you’re tired and looking for answers
Get Curious
For many families, after many months of disrupted sleep (and this threshold looks different for every family), parents begin to feel exhausted and the impacts of sleep deprivation begin to take a toll on their health and well-being. Many parents are left wondering “why is my baby still waking in the night” when they are 6-months, 8-months, 2-years old, 5-years old, etc. The best way to know exactly what’s going on for your child is to get curious! Analyze their sleep patterns and associations and see how we can replace or shift those in a gentle and developmentally appropriate way. Your baby’s sleep is unique and therefore, the reasons they are waking up are going to be unique, too. The reasons may also change from day-to-day and night-to-night.
5 reasons your baby is waking in the night
When we analyze behaviour, and this includes sleep behaviour, we want to uncover and understand the function of the behaviour. Essentially, the “why”. When we get curious and examine these variables, it helps to inform the best way to support and respond to your baby.
Here are the 5 main reasons for night wakings:
- Medical (e.g. sleep apnea, getting sick, not feeling well, eczema, teething, developmental regression, etc.)
- Sensory (e.g. too hot, too cold, hungry, need to pee, diaper soiled, etc.)
- Escape (e.g. the desire to get out of their sleep space, maybe afraid to be in their room alone, etc.)
- Attention/connection (e.g. needing a snuggle, want to sleep with you, want their siblings room, etc.)
- Tangible (e.g. lost their pacifier, can’t find their lovey, etc.)
How to support your baby’s sleep and improve night wakings
Once you’ve discovered the why for your child’s wake-ups, you can confidently respond and support your child through them. With the right strategies, practice and consistency, your child’s sleep journey can and will improve.
For example, if your child is waking frequently because they can’t find their pacifier, maybe you sprinkle 100 of them in their crib. Or maybe you ditch the pacifier all together to eliminate this challenge. Here’s a blog on pacifier use to help you out. If your child is waking because they’re afraid of their room, offer a nightlight and spend some time in their room with them during the day to talk through these fears. For a child that snores, gasps for breath in their sleep and is waking frequently, you’d want to reach out to your child’s primary care provider and talk about these medical concerns and next steps. If you suspect your child is waking because they are too cold, consider adding an extra base layer under their pajamas. If you suspect your child is in a developmental progression, offer support and practice the skills during the day. If you suspect your baby is hungry, you offer them a feed. If they need a snuggle, you offer them a snuggle.
These are just a few examples of how to navigate night wakings once you’ve uncovered the general reason why. There are MANY reasons why your child is waking and therefore, many individual decisions to be made on how to support your child on their sleep journey. There is no right or wrong way to approach a night waking, just a unique response that feels best for you and your baby.
How a sleep consultant can help guide your sleep journey and help support improving your baby’s night wakings
Working with a sleep consultant can help analyze your child’s sleep patterns and routines thoroughly to ensure your child’s unique sleep profile is taken into consideration when looking at the best strategies for them. It’s important to capture as much information about your child’s unique sleep and your parenting preferences to ensure the perfect plan is created that helps meet your family’s sleep goals. Not every strategy you read online is going to be effective for your unique child!
A sleep consultant can also help revise and make recommendations once the journey to more sleep begins and any hiccups that may be encountered. Unlike a book, we talk back and give you real-time feedback based on your child’s progress and how you’re feeling about the process. Analysis and feedback are a distinct feature of working with a consultant, rather than following an example schedule out of a book that may not be best fit for your baby or a course that may not consider your child’s unique personality.
We will talk through every nap and every night throughout our service support. If your child is older, visual supports will be custom made that are specific for your child and family needs. Your child’s sleep will look dramatically different from start to finish and the impacts of more restorative sleep will be immediately felt by everyone in the family.
If you’re struggling with night wakings, not sure the reason for them, or need support to make gentle changes to your child’s sleep, I’d love to guide you through it. Book a free discovery call here and let’s connect. Your journey to more sleep can begin now! If sleep is suddenly a struggle, a support call would be best fit. Check out that service here.
Wishing you a smooth sleep journey!
Chelsea
Chelsea is Mom of 2 young kids and a Certified Baby Sleep Consultant supporting families within Hamilton and beyond using gentle, effective, evidence-based strategies. She has a Masters of Professional Education and over 10 years of professional experience in parent coaching. She works collaboratively with families to empower them with the confidence and tools they need to reach their unique sleep goals. Hear what other rested families are saying about the process and Book a free call with Chelsea to discuss how she can support your family’s sleep journey.